Sunday, August 27, 2006

Twisting in the winds of pain
Hung by unseeing hands
Crying to the empty night
Hope has long since abandoned me
To desolation’s cold embrace
Find solitude in numbness
As what once brought happiness
Leaches away my joy
Regrets chase me
Across this barren wasteland
And into the shadows I fall
And into the shadows I crawl
And with despair I scream
To deaf ears with a muted voice
Safe within the shadows
I squeeze my eyes closed
Shutting out their world

The silence and stillness
Begin to suffocate me
Through the oppression comes a call
A bitter cry much like my own
Towards her I wander
Unsure of what I seek
Yet searching all the same

I find her lying there
Amid the ruin
Faint moonlight shines upon her
Illuminating her battered body
Peering into her eyes
I find a powerful essence
Silhouettes of a pain hidden
She is beautiful
Like nothing I have seen
We approach each other
Lost in the miracle
A refuge in her arms
An understand between us
I offer my disfigured heart
Trusting her to keep it
Receive her precious heart
Vowing to always guard it
Two forsaken souls united
Burning in the darkness
Is our love’s fiery glow

Yet this bliss of ours
Couldn’t remain forever
Talons of ignorance
Abduct me from her side
Yet I carry her heart close to me
Despite their best efforts
Our love wont be extinguished
They imprison me
Within society
Just close my eyes open my mind
And beside me she stands
Reach through the bars of my cage
Crossing lines unseen
Breaking rules unspoken
Risking and losing all
For moments with her
Her smile is a treasure
Worth more than my sacrifice

For every wall we conquer
A hindrance remains
Battle strengthens our bond
Yet we are drained of hope
She turns from me in sorrow
She starts to walk away
Fear consumes my anguished soul
Quietly I walk beside her
Feeling dispirited
Without the words I seek
Silently taking her hand
If only for the last time
Despite my hesitance
Or maybe for it
She stops before the ledge
Returning to shadows with me
For Jess
Holding your hand wont make you stay.
How many times do I have to watch you walk away
Before I can hold you close to me?
What will become of our love that all watch and none see?
In your eyes I find the truth
We are united forever by our hearts
I am the sacrificial lamb
Upon the alter of the damned
Sit and watch me bleed
Satisfy your needs
Drowning your eyes
Twisted by your lies
You open up my veins
Release tormented rains
Upon earths self righteous Bain
This crimson covered innocence
Will cure the world of ignorance
You’re haunted by my desolate screams
Sheltered in your sadistic dreams
Another victim in the past
Destroyed while you laughed
Defiled and laid to waste
I want you to remember me
Choking on your cold cruelty
This last picture of me
Is what the world will see
The pleasure you took in my inhalation
Avenged in exposing your monstrosity
Then in the pits of hell
Where all you victims dwell
Trials of revenge
You cannot escape
We are here to punish you
What heaven cant hell shall do
An eye for an eye
Your penitence is due
They say were crazy
We credit you
Down on your knees
Beg us for mercy
We stifle your pleas
Laugh as you curse me
You held our souls hostage for years
Tormented by hate and dark fears
Now the tables have turned
Reap the torment you’ve earned
See your pride tattered on the floor
We’ll ruin all that you adore
You stare at me what do you see
Another face? A teen disgrace?
Don’t get to know me
Just another
Unreality
Pretend not to see
The blood on my cheek
Red tears in my eyes
I’ll hide behind lies
To protect you from
The pain filled delerium
Hidden within me
Spiraling away
A self destuctive existence
Beauty put to waste
On a manic soul
Push me back in place
I’ll haunt you no more
My forgotten face
Safe behind death’s door

look what i can do !

these are pics of my crocheting


this is the doily i made for our living room





this is the afgan i made for my sis bed




this is my bed i made the afgan myself i think it rocks lol you can see my teddy bear on the bed i have had him since i was three lol i know i am a dork




Sociology: Current Event Discussions

The Psychology and Sociology Study Hall

Friday, August 25, 2006

bloging with mommy

i am showing my mom the funess of bloging say hi
hi
blue is my mommy

Thursday, August 24, 2006

hi

hey everyone!
i cant wait to talk about all the different sociology topics with you. i will proably post political blogs on my page if you are interested in arguing them with me. thanks much ttyl

~SmS~